I have struggled lately. I wake up, and it's hard for me to get out of bed. There is lack of motivation to really get up and do anything. And I have things to do, being a mom of four. I have things I could and get up and accomplish, but lately I haven't really felt like it. I have been wrestling with depression, and have just wanted to curl up in a ball and hide until the day is done. I just feel stuck. At times, it's such a hopeless feeling.
But I can't stay there. I would regret it if I did. I get out of bed, and I have been trying to ask the Lord to help me. Help me see my purpose for the day, not wasting away doing nothing. It's hard. To fight against the urge to not participate in my own life. But I thank the Lord he has been there with me in each moment, even in the ugly ones. He gives me his strength. He has not left my side. And when I get up, I am thankful for the things that I did not miss out on.
My depression seems like it has been a daily battle lately. If I focus on myself so much, it really isn't surprising that I can feel hopeless. But learning at the beginning of the day to place my focus on Jesus gives me hope. It helps me live. It helps me take the next step even if I don't know how it will turn out. He gives me what I need, when I need it. All I have to do is ask. And I can trust him, because he has always been there for me before.
If you're there yourself, I encourage you to ask Jesus to help you. He is faithful to act.